Earth
invisible
Yeh
“weren’t you w/ that one broad?”
“a while back, yeh.”
“now you’re w/ that other broad?”
“yeh.”
“what happened w/ the old broad?”
“up in the clouds, i needed someone in the soil.”
“ah.”
“yeh.”
“you miss that old broad?”
“nah.”
“she was a hot piece, tho.”
“it ain’t about a piece of anything.”
“you’ve gotten soft, brah.”
“whatever makes you hard.”
“funny guy.”
“yeh.”
“well good luck with the new broad.”
“she ain’t so new anymore but thanks.”
“mind if i take a stab at the old broad?”
“prolly stab your heart out, but go for it.”
“funny guy.”
“yeh.”
the benefit of being a famous American writer
my wife and i attended hitler’s funeral. i was a famous american writer and we were the only americans invited. supposedly, hitler was a fan of lowercase. i asked no more questions about it. my wife and i were fascinated by the nazis. we graciously accepted the invitation. before the service, they let people see hitler in the casket privately. my wife and i walked in followed by Apprehension. we loomed over the casket for a minute; he still had his mustache intact.
“do you think he was hung?”
“why would you ask that?”
“powerful man, chip on his shoulder, all that.”
“i doubt it, he was short.”
“so am i, but…”
“babe, you’re just out of proportion.”
she smirked and i did back.
“you want me to check?”
i looked over my shoulder. Apprehension had left, no one else in sight.
“go for it.”
she unbuckled his swastika belt buckle and peered in.
“micropenis.”
“i knew it!”
we got out of there quickly.
Ken Kakareka’s latest novel is Summer of Irresponsibility (Alien Buddha Press, 2023). His words have appeared or are on their way in numerous rags, including The Gorko Gazette, New Pop Lit, and A Thin Slice of Anxiety. A list of selected publications can be found at kenkakareka.com