Jennifer Bort Yacovissi

The Appointment

“Millman Production Group, Harvey Millman’s office.”

        “Yes, may I speak to Andrea?”


        “Hello! This is Jillian Sorensen? I received a message to contact you to confirm an appointment with Mr. Millman?”

“Sorensen, Sorensen . . . yes, here you are. Mr. Millman would like to meet with you in his office next Tuesday at 5 p.m. to discuss a possible role for you in his upcoming movie, “Girl World.”

        “Oh, that’s wonderful! Yes, yes, of course I can make that appointment.”

“Excellent. Now, there are some details you’ll need to be aware of before you arrive. Foremost, you should understand that, during the course of the interview, Mr. Millman will be making a concerted attempt to have sex with you.”

        “I see. And on the continuum from breezy flirtation to heavy seduction to forceable rape, how would you characterize his efforts?”

“On the far side of seduction.”

        “Will the door be locked?”

“Of course. And per standard procedure I’ll be leaving the office immediately after I escort you in to meet with him. The office will be empty.”

        “Understood. Do you know which role he’s considering me for?”

“His notes indicate anything from Girl #47 to Girl #3, depending on his level of satisfaction with the interview.”

        “Oh! Girl #3 is a substantial role.”

“Yes, it is. Be aware that securing a role like that will require a significant commitment on your part. Possibly involving bondage.”


“Or animals.”

        “            ”

“Ms. Sorensen?”

        “Can Mr. Millman be counted on to honor his implied contracts when it comes to these kinds of transactions?”

“Many of the names you know today got their start in Mr. Millman’s office.”

        “Well, that’s encouraging—

“Though there are plenty of other names you have never heard. And never will.”

        “Ahhh. Hmm. Is there anything I should do to prepare?”

“Steel yourself, probably.”

        “I mean, is there anything else I should know?”

“Mr. Millman is even less attractive in person than he appears to be in any photographs you may have seen. Also, his personal hygiene is sketchy. He’s a sweater.”

        “He’s a . . . sweater?”

“He sweats a lot. Drips. Something to consider under the circumstances.”

        “Do you know, has Mr. Millman seen my filmography? I’ve had a recurring role in Kevin Costner’s—”

“Ms. Sorensen, believe me that there is not a single thing in the known universe that Mr. Millman cares less about than your filmography.”

        “            ”

“Ms. Sorensen, please. I have so many, many other girls to call.”

        “Well, I guess I could take that repertory slot in Nipomo that Allie was telling me about.”

“Excellent idea. So I’ll cancel that appointment for you?”

        “I . . . I guess so.”

“Best of luck then. . . Millman Production Group, Harvey Millman’s office, Andrea speaking.”

Jennifer Bort Yacovissi’s debut novel, Up the Hill to Home, tells the story of four generations of a family in Washington, D.C. from the Civil War to the Great Depression. Her short fiction has previously appeared in Gargoyle and Pen-in-Hand. Jenny reviews regularly for the Washington Independent Review of Books, and serves as president of its Board of Directors. She has served as chair or program director of the Washington Writers Conference since 2017.