Gargoyle 11cover etching by Scott McIntyrepublication date 5/25/1979
Newspaper reports are contradictory
as are statements from eye witnesses.
All that can be ascertained to date is
that a famous ageing poet
and a younger woman writer with long brown hair
have been seen copulating ferociously
in Toronto’s most prestigious bookstore.
Their identities remain a mystery
though there is no shortage of speculation.
Cameramen on the scene state
that the eyes are too glazed
and the bodies swaying too fast
for accurate photos to be taken.
The copulating poets have caused
a scandal in Ottawa.
The head of the Canada Council
assured reporters that once the poets’
names were known their fellowships
may be cancelled.
"A jury of peers must decide this, of course,"
the head was reported as giving
out as an official statement.
Meanwhile, on the floor of the Commons
the Prime Minister has risen on a point of order
to declare that his party does not
condone this kind of creative behavior.
Opposition members, not wishing to agree
during this minority Parliament, refrained
from any hasty ejaculations that might stick
Up to the minute reports now indicate
that the copulating writers have moved
from the cramped area in Politics A – B
to the more spacious carpeting in
front of Psychology A – Z.
Neither poet shows signs of tiring
and some customers have begun to step
over them in order to obtain books
from the Public Affairs shelves.
Collectors have arrived at the scene
and already it is rumored
that one prophylactic
containing the sperm of the aging poet
is selling for $ 100
It is listed in slightly worn condition,
Further announcements shall be issued
as events are born and develop.
Right now, it seems safe to say
only that once again Canadian poetry
has been fucked in the marketplace.