Gargoyle 37/38
Cover Photo of Louise Brooks
Published 1/1/1990

Ten Qualities as a Cosmo Girl I Really Want in My Man

Denise Duhamel

I want a boyfriend with antlers.
(I read somewhere if I long in specifics, I’ll be more likely
to get my wish.) A boyfriend like Bambi, he’ll be the one for me.
He’ll have sort of a feminine name
so I won’t immediately think of cusswords and muscles.
Yet he’ll battle for my honor, save my life if he has to.
And when he fights, he and his opponent will turn into shadow.
He’ll never be offensive. He’ll have really good posture,
hold his head high. He’ll look like me, but not cuter:
I’ll have longer lashes and bigger bluer eyes.
He’ll have seen a loved one die, so he’ll understand loss
but will have worked through his grieving by the time we meet.
Yes, he’ll be a prince. He’ll think of me only and give me twins
as calm and easy to take care of as no-iron sheets.